At this point in time,it is within rationality if we say that every Nigerian deserves a Nobel prize just for being a Nigerian.The dramas associated with our country is too much for one to bear.It is impossible for one to spend a complete day without facing an act of impunity that is unique to our country alone.It is due to the many jagwajantis that we singled out some of these ‘norms’ that ought to stop before we get to the end of the last quater of the year which we are into.
1. NEPA AND THE EPILEPSY THEY CALL LIGHT
Since independence,abi na since human beings came to Nigeria,one of the enemies of our progress is PHCN.They always know when to strike.You want to watch Nigeria vs Brazil…kpam light av off.You’ll be watching movie from money,sorry morning till night….just try and pretend to press your clothes and see magic.The part that makes me one to cry is the story of my friend who saw a snake in his room.My nigga grab matchet,lock door to kill snake….NEPA come take light….it needs to end biko
2.ATM SWALLOWING CARDS
In as much as it it a security check,this phenomenon is frustrating.One of my geez changed his password and mistakenly put the previous pin…ATM swallow the card for Abuja and my nigga been wan withdraw money go lodge for hotel…..my nigga nearly commit suicide.I think it is best if the machine rejects the card instead,before we go hear say one Igbo man don die……..
3.Bus drivers/conductors with smelly/dirty body
This one is the most annoying part.Is sit that this Danfo people don’t have water ahbi they get extra bonuses for being dirty.You’ll take your time to bathe,put on perfume but once you come in contact with one of them……everything about you will turn around for bad.I’ll not enter any bus that the driver and conductors are not corporately dressed next yeah……Che I!who slap my eye
4.Slay queens and wrong grammar
Social media today has grown to be a connector of people from far and wide.Many young ladies have realized that it is very easy to ‘blow’ on social media.This endowed girls compete for attention,posting revealing photos and captions that target the male customer sorry audience.Even the ones that skipped English lectures are part of the competition….leading to captions like “a brown new dei has cum” “Thanking God for I’m now a corpse(corper) as if that is not enough,slide into their DM and see wonder “I didnt seeing you” “my heart is breakable plate” Jesu!! WhatsApp and twitter better introduce quiz to screen people out o.
5.Politicians and incredible lies
We done suffer for this country,our politicians that are supposed to take us to the promised land are leaving us to die in the red sea.My guy say “dem promise us change,as dey come,they change the promise”The most annoying part is the story of snake and monkey they bring up for stealing our money.Thank God next year is 2019 sef*laughs in PVC*
6.Lagos people and stealing penis…
Wait let me check my own first……
Is available……Let’s talk now…😉
Recently,some people for whatever reason have been stealing peoples ‘thing’
Many guys have raised alarm that their cassava,abi na carrot went missing after going to the market or some public place.In fact,as I’m writing this article,one of my hands is in my pocket,using style to check my laduma…..you never can tell.If you know say you offend any old woman,abeg brother/uncle beg her!! Before she renders you……..
7.Girls and the 419 called make up
I jus dey look this picture since….see wetin witchcraft sorry make up dey do.Our girls now have two appearance,the one we see during the day and the one they don’t want us to see.Just imagine the picture above.pesin wey see this woman tomorrow without make-up now no go fit recognize am ? Before I ask you out or even collect your number as from next year,you have to wash your face with jik or hypo before I take home a beautified masquerade home.Ehe,please help me ask pastors if this make-up thing is not a sin,because me I’m not understanding.