You’ve envisioned me as a simple being, a single entity with a chaotic mind full of traumatic experiences of life, who emerges uncontrollably further into the darkest moments wishing for newer days so I could beat time and see the beauty that lies underneath this ugly world.
True, But when my eyelids flutter open, all I wish for is harmony like the songs that play in my head while I’m asleep.
I’m afraid of what the day might bring. More drama, less drama, or no drama?
I wonder if I’m anything close to a lustrous pearl that remains safe and whole in an oyster or a broken shell of a snail run over by big trucks in their constant rush. When I don’t speak I feel like a prisoner who has been asked to hush, bottling up unspoken words under a layer of doubt and fear,picking up myself day by day despite the pain and guilt I feel, dealt with.
Even when my strength is feeble, I know the fight for my survival is inevitable. Else, I let these chumps win! You sit and spill to the streets stupid illusions of who you think I am or what I’ve done with mindless gossips and half-baked stories you can never really speak of to my face because you are a coward constantly seeking approval from the crowd.
I am the only one who knows my story.how it begins, how it’s going.
where I’m constantly caught up in words I can’t push back, leaving me befuddled because I’m enraged in a bottomless pit still figuring out how to fight, when to fight and when it will come to an end.
I just keep going. On and on, putting on the sleeve of faith. Taking each step with elegance, wearing the smile of confidence. I’d be a fool to let you break me, I’m no simple being. I move with forces in heaven I’m no single entity. I’m extraordinary. “You don’t know me”
What do you think?