This too, shall pass.
January this year, I had no plans laid out. I was finally hitting the big 21 and I panicked. I felt like I had achieved nothing, still dependent on my parents and still struggling with school.
I almost slid into depression as I lost all hope. What will I be doing with my life?.
It doesn’t help that I’m so busy with classes that I couldn’t do anything else. I couldn’t even go to the gym and I was neck deep in school work and exams.
February came and went and school work eased but I still felt so lost. I had no plans for my life or anything going.
When the Pandemic hit, it met me in this undecided state. Now that I have some borrowed time due to the pandemic, what do I do with it, I started to think.
I applied for several courses but I eventually lost interest in them. I was depressed and felt like a weight on my shoulders was stopping me.
“Ara, let’s do a writing challenge, just you and I”. My friend suggested.
I laughed. Writing challenge?. I haven’t picked up a pen to write in 2years. The more I worried about my writer’s block, the worse it got.
‘Since I have time now, and I’m losing interest in everything, why don’t I give it a try again’, I thought.
After the first two trials, I wrote a story I couldn’t believe was from myself. It was that good.
I’ve kept writing since then, Writing at least two piece a day, with barely any break.
I don’t feel so lost anymore. I’ve taken some of the course I neglected, started learning french, learning how to manage a website and even how to apply make up which I haven’t done in 3years!
Writing has been my sole source of sanity this past month and I’m grateful for the gift of it.
When the Pandemic ends, I’ll keep writing.
I’ll write whenever I feel stuck or helpless and also do yoga too.
I also promised myself not to rush me. To take my time and figure it all out slowly.
When the pandemic ends and as the world heal, I hope I finally find myself.
The world has so much to offer and I also have so much to give.
That exchange… I plan to make.