September 23rd

September 23rd

I woke up this morning to a sudden reminder that I hadn’t gotten the stuff. The intensity of the air-con beating against my sparsely hairy chest was a reminder that I was in the wrong wing of Bro’s house.

I slept off at Bro’s place yesterday, since I was too lazy to drive back home after the little house party Tunde and I had organized for Bro to help him relieve stress.

Quickly, as I stood from the white fluffy feather couch, I slid into one of Bro’s flip-flops and rushed downstairs in the twirling complexity of his house.

I hated the look he gave me whenever I forgot to do anything he asked me to, so I was hastily going to get this done before he came out of his study.

Bro was only 31, but despite his unforgiving wealth and luxury acquisition, he still had that sickening habit of locking himself up in his study for the majority of the early hours of the day. A habit that’d stuck with him since the first day he entered our father’s study.

I was only two then. Bro was nine and annoyingly bossy. But I grew up to respect him much more than I loved him. He always got the job done.

“Tunde! Abeg follow me reach Lapel side I wan carry mumsie stuff.”
Tunde was always excited whenever I called him to accompany me for these errands.

The last time was a visit to the Commissioner’s daughter house. Though it was for the closed-door settlement of a serious lawsuit; Tunde didn’t hesitate to jump inside my Camaro as I ignited the engines. He wasn’t even wearing a suit.

This morning, I decided to take Bro’s car. He had just gotten the new model track tyres for his car last week, and this was my first opportunity at trying them out.

Driving through the Island on the way to Lapel’s place. I could feel the power behind the wheels. His McLaren was a different customization entirely. Full tuning upgrades and complete power tech specs. It was literally the Alienware of supercars.

Bro had the money anyways and he wasn’t clueless about making more of it. For me, I was only a low key player in the game of the huge money cycle, and my massive monthly hits were only a tenth of what Bro bagged in daily.

Finally, we arrived at Lapel’s compound. As we drove in, I could see it just outside his open garage but I still had to ask for the keys and paper from Lapel’s contract manager. Lapel himself was with the Arabs. He had been out of the country for over a month.

Mayowa Mofe-Davies was the contract manager. A daughter of Akintola Mofe-Davies. The young blood that once spilled her drink on me, because I told her on a second date that her pant line was rather conspicuous. I was only 21 then, but already rashly brute.

Today, however, she seemed different. Open and convincingly interested in my presence. I wasn’t bothered. I was done with ladies, and it was already a year since I last spoke extensively to a lady except during business dealings.

Mayowa, however, had nothing to do with that.

At this point, I was more likely to date Tunde than hold a conversation with any of the hundred Island girls I knew.

“Lapel instructed that no one was to unveil it till you arrived”. Mayowa sounded casual, which etched a sting of discomfort in me. I just wanted to get out of there.

Tunde rushed to the car and gently drew up the black veil. As soon as it was open, he staggered in amazement. It was his first time ever seeing an actual Agera RS. The details were blinding.

“Damn!” Mayowa coughed out the words before she could think. The car was an insane marvel, going home for 350 million naira.

Bro hadn’t been joking when he declared last week that he was going to repay Mama back. The house my two sisters got her on the coastline didn’t even match the cost of this single limited-edition Agera RS.

At this time, I was already laughing wildly. I was the first person that was going to ride this car. “Evil!’ I wiggled.

“Tunde, you’re driving Bro’s car. This one’s mine”. Tunde didn’t protest. He was literally scared of touching the car, let alone driving it.

Beeping the door open with the high-proximity fingerprint sensor remote, I was about stepping into the car, when Mayowa called me back.

“Hey, I just wanted to say I’m sorry for last time.” She paused to watch my reaction. Her smile was strange.

Tunde knew I needed rescue the moment I tilted my head left, and he didn’t hesitate to approach.

“Mayowa. See, It’s Big Mummy’s birthday today. This present has to get halfway across the Island before Bro starts calling us. Definitely this, whatever it is, can wait.”

“I’m sorry”. Mayowa said, holding her hands together across her pleated skirt.

She stood straight and confident on her black work-heels. But it was her quivering lips and the way she bit against them that gave her away.

We drove the cars back to Bro’s house. He had freshened up, dressed and was already waiting. Getting down, I handed him the keys and headed to my Camaro. Tunde still drove Bro’s car.

We took the convoy to the hotel where our sisters settled in yesterday after a late flight from Ontario. We didn’t bother getting down to hug and get together since they were already waiting for us in Big Sister’s car.

Tunde had settled that for us the previous night when they arrived. Regrettably, Lola, the younger of my two sisters, was going to be riding with Big Sister since I had been too lazy to follow Tunde to drive her own car to her the previous night.

With this, the party was set. We were on our way to the coastline to surprise Mama.

The only issue I have had with Bro asides his consistent request of my progress stat, account statements, and the report of my cash flow systematic; was his slow driving. However, today, the slow drive was distinctively appealing.

The remarkable beauty of the cars and the flamboyant display of headlights made every head turn. I felt so proud of Tunde.

Tunde sure knew how to go big. It was his idea all along. The small boy of Mushin that had become an important part of the family. No one knew exactly how he did it… But his effectiveness and unparalleled creativity had earned him a spot in Papa’s heart. The same love we all now shared towards him.

Big Sister was first, in her Audi R8 with Lola. She had bought the car just before she finally left for Ontario last harmattan. And it was in her compound till Bro moved it to his house. I always knew Bro had control issues.

Right after Big Sister and Lola was Tunde, riding in Bro’s McLaren. The brand new Agera RS was next. And myself, right behind all of them.

Thirty minutes slow match and we were arriving at Mama’s house. It was a simple spacious rectangular marvel that overlooked the beach. She got weekly supplies of food and essentials from one of my superstore branch on the Island.

Also, Mama had finally succumbed to the pressure of getting a dog when Papa arrived from his long stay in Paris, late last year. It was a huge satisfaction for me. Mama hated dogs. Papa loved them. I loved them. It was a long battle but she finally compromised for the boys.

Funnily, though Papa always prided himself with being knowledgeable about all of our activities, even he, had no idea of what we had in store for Mama.

I personally stuffed in the latest model of the Samsung S classics, to replace the previous version she had. It was one of my own gifts. And my sisters sure had something up their sleeves.

But the Agera RS, that was the blockbuster.

As we stormed the house, Mama couldn’t believe her eyes. The four of us at once, finally! It had been nearly half a decade since she last saw that.

Tunde was outside with the car, smiling sheepishly as we walked Mama outside, eyes locked.

“So we open your eyes in three, two, one…” Bro removed his hands from her eyes.

I was totally expecting a loud scream of amazement followed by intensive prayers for us, before she finally approached the car… But all I could hear was a weirdly familiar Yoruba statement. “Sho ma m’ogi?”

This was mama asking me if I was going to drink Pap.

Promptly and regrettably, I opened my eyes and woke up this morning. It had all been a dream.

And after staring at my mother for almost half a minute, I couldn’t help but enunciate the words…“Ha! I will never be broke in my life!”

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  1. Jesusssssssss!!! My heart broke😂😂😂 And here I was feeling like the poorest rat in church. Brilliant piece SD. You do have a way of building up the passion, bur heartlessly ripping it away before climax👏😪

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