I’ve never wanted to pretend like a day didn’t happen more than today. It’s supposed to be my birthday. A beautiful day when I feel happy and overjoyed and for some time I was. Now I’m numb, I feel wrecked, like everyone just wants to come and suck up my joy. I don’t get people…I don’t get how they do this to the one they claim to love. I was happier when I was naive and oblivious. This isn’t a celebration. It is an execution and the one they’re killing is my emotions and feelings. I don’t even care much anymore. I used to say this the previous years and end up in premium tears, but now, I really just feel absolutely nothing. I think I’ll rather just fake the smile and the joy and tell everyone I’m fine and anyone that notices and wants to talk, I’ll tell them (Dead the thought)…after all…if my happiness was really worth it, they wouldn’t work so hard to destroy it.
So, when people come wishing, their hearts full and they’re saying…happy birthday, long life, all I feel is the anger and the strife as the cycle continues and my day’s been ruined…yet again…and the dark voice in my head, with the final whisper of, happy birthday dear as I hurt, myself.