It’s been 3 days since I heard from Jude. Anytime I checked my phone anxiously, I was expecting to see a message from him but nothing.
I met Jude at a Youth conference and we seem to have connected easily. We spoke like we had known each other from birth. Right from our favorite food to music , personal habits and our sense of humor, we were just good for each other. After a couple of dates getting to know each other, I just knew our energies were a vibe.
Jude stopped texting me . He stopped replying my texts as well. Even my calls were directed to his voicemails. “But how ? When I just saw his status update on WhatsApp minutes ago ?? Ah well I guess he might be busy.” I told myself.
After a week, I still didn’t believe Jude was “ghosting me”. What did I do wrong? Perhaps he doesn’t like me.
Disappearing unexpectedly from someone’s life without answering their calls, text,or emails is Ghosting. A very sensitive situation in our Relationships. It is a form of rejection that hurts and makes one feel abandoned.
Ghosts are not bad .They do not have any purpose but they show up based on their history and their values.
In amorous interests, after a couple of dates with someone, disappearing unexpectedly on the person could be because they didn’t feel a spark or were too busy to get in touch. Whereas in platonic friendships, friends who unexpectedly ghost on you may be busy or probably got something going on with them . Sometimes they find it difficult to justify why they don’t seem interested anymore.
Leaving messages like “ Hi Jude, been a while. I honestly want to know my stand in our relationship, since the vibe I am getting tells that you are not interested anymore.”
Alternatively, checking on them to find out if they’re Okay and seeking to find out why they ghosted.
But if you persist, and they keep ghosting you, pack your baggages and WE MOVE!!
Moving On will save you some self worth.
Trying to justify or give an excuse for their behaviour won’t change anything. Truth is , you were not a Priority for calls or texts. Just stay away , put your phone down and don’t chase ghosts.
“What’s the problem with me?, What did I do wrong? Did I offend him? “these questions will toss in and out of your head. Don’t fret . The problem is not with you. It’s their problem. We give so much power to the people that ghost on us . They have given a glimpse into their terms of relation when in intimate Relationships. They are sending a clear message that says: I don’t have what it takes to have a mature relationship with you. They simply are communicating that , if it gets tough , they are going to run . Just be the better person,retain your dignity and let them go peacefully.
It’s always good to look on the brighter side.
Ghosting on someone without notice means they don’t deserve you. They are not qualified to stick with you. Feel free and find some one who will return the vibes you give. No one wants to feel like they’ve been punched in the guts. Just keep your energy focused on doing what makes you happy. Just know that being a nice person who treats people with respect and integrity does not put you on a ghoster’s wavelength. Someone will come your way as long as you keep your heart clean , open and your focus forward.