“Over the years, girls have come to stick to the silent commandments that outline the Do’s and DONT’s of a good friendship. This unspoken set of rules that exist between a girl and her best friends is known as the Girl Code.”

Amber, Jemima, Evenly, and I met during our orientation lecture at the University of Ibadan. On that particular day, we had three things in common; we were all fresher’s, sitting on the 11th role, and putting on the same colour of top (though different shades). Bored from the lecture delivered by the Dean of Students, we started exchanging movies from our phones. Michael a 200 level student from the Department of Anthropology asked if he could sit beside Evelyn and she gladly said yes (unknown to us that he was only attending the welcome party for the sake of item 7). After the program, Michael assumed we were friends and was fascinated when we told him we were meeting for the first time. Right there and then, we started our journey as friends.

Every Friday and Sunday evenings, we hung out together at the table tennis court; other days we went to the movies and some other days too we did our thing at the Theater Art (that place was always on fire, fun all the way). Evelyn been a Thespian made it easy for us to interact with her course mates. By the end of first semester, Michael and Evelyn started dating (even though she denied it then). We her friends, knew better for she was always talking and ranting about Michael.

Suddenly, their relationship grew cold. Micheal said Evyy was becoming over bearing and demanding, Evvy on the other hand, claims Michael was becoming more of a ‘monitoring spirit’ than a boyfriend. He was jealous, and over protective (which made it all the more obvious to us that they had a thing going on). She wanted an open relationship but he doesn’t want any of that. Amber, Jemima, and I felt Evvy wasn’t really ready to commit herself to any relationship. She said they never really dated. She called what they had a ‘Situationship‘.

Initially, hanging out together was awkward but for friendship sake, Evelyn and Micheal made peace and blew off the steam (it was difficult as hell). In 300 level second semester, Amber started dating Kuma (the son of the Dean of Faculty of Education). They were great together. Jemima had no interest in guys. I was still very single. Evvy was seeing another guy in Sociology again. This time around it was serious. The seven of us made it a date to still hang out at the Nescafe Garden, other times at the front of our halls of residents (despite our busy schedules).

A.S.S.U went on strike towards the end of the session. The girls went home but I stayed back at the hostel in order to complete my three months training on makeup which I just started. One day, Micheal called and ask if I could accompany him to see the play ‘Princess Ruka and the Bachelors Eve’ at Theater Art. I was flattered because we don’t really get along that well. After that night, we started hanging out together. One night, after he escorted me back to Idia Hall, he kissed me. To cut the whole story short we fall in love, he asked me out and we started dating.

“Number one rule of girl code is that you do not flirt or date any man that your FRIEND has dated or FANCIES.”

The strike is over; my girls are back and I can’t keep this a secret. I know I have to tell them (that’s the right thing to do). I know Evvy will be furious and definitely disapprove of the union. It is simply the girl code; never date your gf’s ex, even if it was just a crush. Now I am sitting on a fence. I don’t know what to do. I value my friendship with my girls, but should I choose love over my girls?

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