It’s me again you guys! Usually I like having peace and quiet when I write but tonight’s an exception but we do what? We move!
Now what’s body shaming? If you’d asked me 3 years ago,as embarrassing as this is I’d have said it’s treating someone with disdain because they’re fat. Yeah,I used to think it was just about fat people,immature eh? I know. But if you ask me now I’d say body shaming is so much more than that, it’s treating a person different because of something about their body, it’s that disgusted face you make when you see that guy with the big nose and that snicker when the girl with those big lips pass you by. It’s that gasp that you voluntarily make when you see that very dark skinned girl and it’s how you mutter “she’s actually not pretty, she’s just annoyingly fair” when you see that light skinned girl. It’s how you instantly search for another seat when you see a fat person in the seat next to yours in church and how you offer that skinny girl more food at the party because she looks like she’s “a bag of bones walking”
It’s how you say that guy has weirdly large palms and how you say a girl’s abnormal for wearing a shoe size above 39. It’s how you turn down food from a waiter and go to another because she was “disgustingly” wrinkled. And how you instinctively hold your breathe throw your eyes away when that poor man with bleeding sores asks for a lift to the hospital since it’s your route. And how you feel someone isn’t worthy of existence because they’re not your definition of “perfect”
I could go on and on stating different instances that explain body shaming but I think I’ve made my point. But I’ll give two examples that happened to me. So you understand better.
First,I don’t have really straight legs and I’ve always been insecure about it since forever but my friends always told me I looked good and it isn’t a big deal and alladat. It didn’t change my insecurities to be honest,but it gave me slight confidence in myself – only that it was shattered a certain evening. I was going to my hostel to get something I’d forgotten that I’d need during prep (I went to a boarding house… For clarity) and you know in the evenings,we see silhouettes of a person except if you are up close. So I heard someone call my name and when i turned back, she’d said to the other girl with her “I told you,immediately I saw those legs,I just knew it was her and I wasn’t wrong” Now,she hadn’t been trying to insult me or “body shame” me but without even realizing it she had. And that’s how a number of us are. Of course,there are those who consciously do it,but a good number of us don’t even realize that they’re doing it.
And let me state the second instance,I had posted a picture on my status once and someone just said, “you’re not so fat oh, but do you know you’re the second biggest girl I know (and he’d meant big by size) He also wasn’t trying to be insulting or demeaning but he’d been. And that’s the worse case,we don’t even realize how we’d hurt someone else, someone who perhaps already had insecurities about something and then you just go ahead and make them feel worse.
It’s habitual sometimws but it’s something that honestly can be curbed if we all determine to work on. So before you make that nasty comment,before you make those gagging sounds when you see someone,pause and think. What if this person feels insecure about this? Why should I even judge someone based on their features that they had no say in creating? Because if we all had a say in our creation and looks, they’d probably be perfections and lack of diversity.